I’ve heard of some really good reasons why you should discuss things with your child and good reasons to mentally prepare a child for a change in activity. Let me just say why that single piece of advice MIGHT NOT WORK.
In the case of my daughter, mentally preparing her for something makes her concentrate on it. This kid and her level of concentration! I’ve learned my lesson and here’s why I don’t do it anymore.
Talking about getting ready to go bye bye: If she really don’t want to leave, she’ll throw a fit and concentrates on NOT wanting to go bye bye, regardless of the fact that you may very well be explaining she has a few minutes to do whatever it is she did want to do. Prime example, I was yelled at leaving because it was time to leave the doctor’s office because she REALLY didn’t want to go. “I no want leave. I play Doctor!”
Or, if it’s something she does want to do, you’ll never hear the end of it. Packing up to stay with the Grandparents. Preparing her for it just meant I had to listen to her fuss at me to go bye bye to see PaPaw for the next 20 minutes. I seriously can’t get packed up quickly enough for her at times like these.
Finally, using as leverage to invoke good behavior has really back-fired. Asking her to take her nap or quiet time so that we can do x has always lead to either a shorter nap or quiet time. What happens? She holds on to it and 30 minutes later is screaming from her room. Go in, and she’ll promptly tell you she’s ready for whatever it is you suggested you were doing after nap/quiet time.
Nope, mentally preparing your child may not be the best advice. We don’t do it in this house, that’s for sure.
What’s your take?
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