Home Mom LifeAdvice for New Moms The Best Tips for New Moms

The Best Tips for New Moms

by Ivy B

Our comprehensive tips for new moms offers essential advice aimed at helping you to navigate the challenging, yet rewarding journey of the first year of motherhood. It blends practical advice with humorous anecdotes and real-life experiences, empowering and reassuring new mothers. Covering everything from rest, being a good wife, and taking care of yourself, this should guide you through most of the new mom phase.

Ever feel like you’re drowning in a sea of spit-up, sleep deprivation, and unsolicited advice? Yeah, me too, and twice over! That’s right, I’ve braved the sleepless nights and mastered the art of the diaper blowout escape (with varying degrees of success, I might add).

But before you picture me as some kind of superwoman, let me assure you, my journey was far from picture-perfect. There were meltdowns (both mine and the babies’), questionable fashion choices (hello, yoga pants and leggings for life!), and enough coffee to fuel a small village.

Take, for instance, the one morning I was smugly preparing to take my newborn upstairs for a nap, remembering all I’d learned about laying babies down before they were overtired. I knew I was going to get some rest and I was excited about it.

But at just a few weeks old, my son realized exactly what was about to happen, and began crying so violently that he ended up projectile vomiting all over me and his bed.

Instead of getting much needed rest, I ended up spending the next hour cleaning the bed, bathing my son, and taking a shower myself.

This, my friends, is what it is to be a new mom: unpredictable, messy, and strangely enough, filled with moments of unexpected joy.

But hey, through the chaos, I learned a thing or two. So, if you’re a new mom, feeling overwhelmed, and wondering if you’re doing it all “wrong” (spoiler alert: there’s no such thing!), then this guide is for you. Consider it a battle-tested survival manual from one mama to another, filled with honest advice, a healthy dose of humor, and the unwavering belief that you’ve totally got this, even if it feels like you’re winging it most of the time (because, trust me, you probably are!).

So, grab a cup of coffee (or wine, no judgment here!), put your feet up (if the tiny human overlord allows it), and let’s dive into the wonderful, messy, and utterly hilarious world of new motherhood, together!

Top tips for new moms pinterest image
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What is the Best Advice for New Moms?

Forget the baby whisperer books and the latest internet trends, mama. The real secret weapon in your arsenal? Your own gut instinct. Trust me, it’s far more reliable than anything you’ll read online, especially in a moment of desperation at 3 am.

Think about it: you spent nine months growing this tiny human, so who else knows them better than you? Sure, you’ll get bombarded with advice from everyone and their dog – your parents, in-laws, friends, even the cashier at the grocery store who swears by a particular brand of swaddle (spoiler alert: they all work, or they don’t, depending on your little bundle of joy’s unique preferences).

But here’s the thing: when your baby throws a meltdown that sounds like a banshee audition, and every “expert” has a different opinion, who do you turn to? Yourself, mama! You know your baby’s cries, their feeding cues, their sleepy yawns. Trust that inner voice, even if it’s telling you to ditch the fancy baby food and just mash up some banana because, let’s be honest, sometimes that’s all they’ll eat anyway.

Of course, seeking advice from professionals and experienced moms is always helpful. But remember, you’re the ultimate decision-maker for your little one. So take a deep breath, trust your gut, and rock this whole motherhood thing, even if it means rocking back and forth while singing show tunes at 2 AM. You’ve got this, mama!

What Do New Moms Need Most?

Picture this: You’re knee-deep in dirty laundry, the baby is crying like a banshee, and the only “meal” you’ve had today is a lukewarm cup of coffee and a few rogue Cheerios you found hiding under the couch. Sounds familiar, right?

New moms need a lot of things, but here are the top contenders in my book:

1. The Super Squad: This isn’t your average superhero team, mama. We’re talking about an army of angels disguised as friends, family, and even the friendly neighbor who always seems to have a casserole in hand. These are the folks who’ll whip up a mealfold a mountain of laundry, or magically whisk your tiny tyrant away for a few glorious hours so you can take a nap or, dare I dream, shower in peace. Remember, don’t be afraid to ask for help. A little goes a long way, and trust me, your Super Squad will be happy to swoop in and save the day (or at least the afternoon).

2. A Listening Ear (and a Non-Judgmental Heart): New moms often feel like they’re drowning in a sea of emotions – exhaustion, overwhelm, and yes, even the occasional burst of frustration. What they need is someone to listen without judgment, someone who understands the rollercoaster ride that is motherhood. This could be your partner, a close friend, or even a therapist. Just find someone who will validate your feelings and offer encouragement without launching into unsolicited advice (we’ll get to that later!).

3. Patience (for Themselves and the Tiny Human): Let’s be honest, mama, learning the ropes of parenthood takes time. There will be meltdowns (both yours and the baby’s), there will be sleep deprivation, and there will be moments where you question your sanity. But remember, be patient with yourself. You’re doing an amazing job, even if it doesn’t always feel like it. And extend that patience to your little one as well. They’re learning and growing every day, and sometimes that means a few bumps along the road.

4. A Moment of Peace (and Maybe a Hot Shower): Sometimes, all a new mom needs is a moment to breathe. Whether it’s a hot bath, a walk in the park, or simply a cup of coffee enjoyed in silence, these small moments of self-care can work wonders for your sanity and well-being. Don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself, mama. A recharged and rejuvenated you is a better you – for your baby and everyone else.

5. Realistic Expectations (Because Let’s Be Honest, “Blissful” Doesn’t Always Apply): Newborns are adorable, yes, but let’s not sugarcoat it: they also come with sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, and the occasional meltdown that would make a rock cry. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and your baby can help you avoid feeling overwhelmed and disappointed. Remember, motherhood is a journey, not a destination, and it’s okay if things don’t always go according to plan.

6. A Sense of Humor (seriously, you’ll need it): Because let’s be honest, mama, there will be moments that will make you want to laugh or cry (or maybe both at the same time). But trust me, having a good sense of humor will help you navigate the inevitable meltdowns, both yours and the baby’s. So don’t be afraid to laugh at the absurdity of it all, it’s the best medicine (besides actual medicine, of course).

The key thing to remember is that every new mom is different and what one needs might not be the same for another. The most important thing is to be there for themoffer your support in whatever way you can, and let them know they’re not alone.

Essential Items for New Moms

We all know the registry basics – the diapers, wipes, onesies galore. But let’s be real, there are some unsung heroes out there that can make your new-mom journey a little smoother (or at least, prevent a complete meltdown). Add these battle-tested essentials to your list:

1. A Comfortable Nursing Bra (or Two, or Three): This one’s a no-brainer. You’ll be living in this thing, so choose comfort over cuteness (although, hey, who says you can’t have both?). Choose supportive, breathable fabrics that make feeding a breeze (or as close to a breeze as it gets with a tiny human attached). I really liked wireless nursing bras like these.

Baby sleeping on boppy pillow ©Ivy Boyter, SAHM, plus... 2011

2. A Nursing Pillow (Your Arms Will Thank You): Those early days of feeding can be marathons, mama. This plush friend will prop up your little one, freeing your arms from the constant ache and giving you a much-needed break (and maybe even allowing you to multitask, like scrolling through endless baby photos, because let’s be honest, new moms deserve a little distraction!).

I loved my boppy nursing pillow with removable/washable covers! Plus, it was a lifesaver when my babies would fall asleep after a feeding session (see picture above).

Boppy Nursing Pillow Original Support, Gray Taupe Leaves, Ergonomic Nursing Essentials for Bottle and Breastfeeding, Firm Fiber Fill, with Removable Nursing Pillow Cover, Machine Washable
  • CREATED FOR COMFORT: Designed by a mom, this nursing pillow provides relief to your arms and back by lifting your baby to a more ergonomic position when breastfeeding, bottle feeding, and bonding
  • YOU HAVE OPTIONS: C-shaped design allows for multiple feeding styles—cradle, cross cradle, football hold, bottle feeding
  • EASY CARE, MACHINE WASHABLE: Machine washable and dryable because messes happen
  • MORE COVERS AVAILABLE: Comes covered in a removable cover, and additional covers are sold separately so you can have backup on laundry day
  • AWAKE-TIME ONLY: This product is for baby’s adult-supervised awake-time for feeding and bonding, not for sleep

3. A Carrier or Wrap (or Both!): Whether you’re a pro-babywearing mama or a complete newbie, a carrier is your secret weapon. It allows you to keep your little one close while staying hands-free, perfect for errands, chores, or simply snuggling on the couch. Just remember, there’s a learning curve, so don’t get discouraged if it takes a few tries (and maybe a YouTube tutorial or two) to master the art of the perfect wrap. Check out this article for help on choosing the best baby carrier.

A baby carrier was THE NUMBER ONE item that saved me from so much chaos with baby #2!!

Smiling mom staring down at smiling baby in a baby carrier © Ivy Boyter, SAHM, plus 2016

4. A White Noise Machine (Drowning Out the Chaos): Your household might be a bit noisy to a newborn, and sometimes you both just need a little peace and quiet. A white noise machine can be a lifesaver, masking household sounds and creating a calming environment for your little one to drift off to sleep (and maybe even you, mama!).

5. A Diaper Caddy (Organization is Key): Diaper changes happen everywhere, mama, so be prepared! A portable caddy stocked with all the essentials – diapers, wipes, rash cream, and maybe even a few entertainment essentials for the little one – will make those diaper duty moments a breeze, no matter where you are.

6. A Multipurpose Nipple Cream (Because Ouch): Sore nipples are a common struggle for breastfeeding moms. This cream can be your knight in shining armor, providing soothing relief and helping you continue your breastfeeding journey more comfortably.

7. A Large Water Bottle (Hydration is Queen): Between feedings, diaper changes, and the general chaos, staying hydrated can easily fall by the wayside. This oversized water bottle serves as a constant reminder to drink up, mama! Choose one with a fun design or motivational quote to keep you going throughout the day. This one is my favorite!

8. A Sleep Training Course (Sleep is Essential for All): All the advice about getting baby to sleep sounds so counterproductive, but it works. Want to hear it from an expert? Invest in a reputable sleep training course when your baby is about 6 months old, because it’s much harder to sleep train after that!

How Long Does it Take to Get Used to Being a New Mom?

Think of it like learning a new language, only instead of “Hola!” and “Adios,” you’re mastering the art of deciphering baby babble and understanding the universal language of a dirty diaper. It’s a crash course in everything from sleep deprivation to spit-up removal, and let’s be honest, some days you might feel like you’re failing both Spanish and parenthood simultaneously.

Studies and surveys say the first few months are the “Everest” of the new-mom journey. You’re figuring out feeding schedules, sleep routines (or lack thereof), and the ever-present debate of swaddle or no swaddle. But remember, these are just averages, not a strict timeline.

Some mamas might feel like they’ve got the hang of things after a few weeks, while others (like yours truly) might still be questioning their sanity after a year (don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal!).

The key thing, mama, is to be kind to yourself. This is a huge life change, and it takes time to adjust. Celebrate the small victories, like finally getting your baby to sleep through the night (even if it’s just for a glorious two hours). And remember, even veteran moms like me still have moments where we feel like clueless newbies.

So, don’t compare your journey to anyone else’s. Embrace the chaos, trust your gut, and know that you’re doing an amazing job! After all, who else can say they can speak fluent baby and survive on minimal sleep and questionable fashion choices (hello, yoga pants, my new best friend)?

The 5 Best Tips for New Moms Who Want to Be Good Wives

Balancing your roles as a new mom and a wife can feel like juggling flaming chainsaws while riding a unicycle on a tightrope. And if you’re not careful, you can destroy your marriage by not giving your spouse the attention he deserves.

Trust me, I know what harm is caused by not prioritizing my husband and it’s a mistake I aim not to ever make again.

But fear not, mama! Here are some new mom tips that might help:

1. Communication is Key: Talk to your partner openly and honestly about your needs and feelings. Let them know what kind of support you need, whether it’s a listening ear, a helping hand with chores, or just some “me time.” Remember, they’re on this journey with you too!

2. Redefine “Quality Time”: Forget the fancy restaurant dinners and movie nights (for now, at least). Quality time can be as simple as cuddling on the couch with your partner while the baby naps, or sharing a quiet cup of coffee while taking turns feeding.

3. Embrace the Team Mentality: Think of yourselves as a team, not just individual parents and spouses. Divide and conquer tasks, be flexible with schedules, and don’t be afraid to ask for help from each other. You’re in this together!

4. Keep the Spark Alive: It’s easy to let romance fall by the wayside when you’re sleep-deprived and covered in spit-up. But don’t forget to nurture your relationship. Steal a few kisses, leave each other little love notes, participate in a shared interest, or plan a simple date night when you can (grandparents or babysitters, anyone?).

5. Be Gentle with Yourself (and Each Other): This is a new and challenging phase for both of you. Be patient with yourselves, forgive each other’s mistakes, and celebrate the small victories. A happy and healthy relationship starts with self-compassion and understanding.

Bonus Tip: Don’t be afraid to seek outside help. Talk to a therapist, join a support group, or hire occasional childcare. A little assistance can go a long way in reducing stress and creating space for your relationship to thrive.

Remember, mama, balance is a myth. There will be days when you feel like you’re excelling at one role but neglecting the other. Not only is this okay, it’s totally normal! The most important thing is to communicate openly, support each other, and focus on what truly matters: your family and your love for each other.

What Do You Say to a Struggling New Mom?

As a mom who’s been through the trenches (and still occasionally finds herself there!), I know how tough it can be when things feel overwhelming. So, what do you say to a struggling new mom? Here are a few things that might resonate:

1. “You’re not alone.” This might seem simple, but it’s incredibly powerful. Remind her that every mom feels overwhelmed and out of their depth at times. It’s a normal part of the journey, and she’s not alone in her struggles.

2. “It’s okay to not be okay.” Sometimes, all a new mom needs is to hear that it’s perfectly okay to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or even scared. Don’t try to minimize her feelings or offer platitudes like “everything happens for a reason.” Just acknowledge her struggles and let her know it’s okay to feel them. And if you don’t always like motherhood, she might find that nugget useful as well.

3. “What can I do to help?” Instead of offering unsolicited advice, offer concrete support. This could be anything from cooking a meal, watching the baby for a few hours, running errands, or simply cleaning a few dishes. Even small gestures can make a big difference.

4. “You’re doing an amazing job.” New moms often doubt themselves and feel like they’re not doing enough. It meant the world to me when someone told me I was a good mom, especially when things were rough! Remind her of all the amazing things she’s doing for her baby, even if they seem small or insignificant. Acknowledge her efforts and celebrate her strength.

5. “You’re a strong and capable mama.” Sometimes, all a new mom needs is a little pep talk. Remind her of her inner strength, her ability to adapt, and her capacity to overcome challenges. Let her know you believe in her.

Bonus Tip: If the mom seems particularly overwhelmed, encourage her to seek professional help. A therapist or counselor can offer additional support and guidance during this challenging time.

The most important thing is to be supportive, empathetic, and understanding. Sometimes, just being there to listen and offer a hug can make all the difference to a struggling new mom.

Let me leave you with this:

Remember, motherhood is a marathon, not a sprint. There will be days when you feel like you’re winning at this whole parenting thing, and others where you’ll be questioning your sanity while singing the “Wheels on the Bus” for the 100th time. But hey, that’s the beauty (and chaos) of it all!

So, embrace the journey, mama. Savor the snuggles (even the ones that come with a side of explosive diaper), and remember, you’re doing an amazing job!

And hey, if you need a little extra dose of laughter, support, and maybe some tips that go beyond “sleep when the baby sleeps” (because let’s be honest, that never happens), then sign up for my email newsletter! It’s like a virtual hug from a friend who’s been there, done that, and maybe even bought the T-shirt (stained with who-knows-what, but a T-shirt nonetheless).

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2 comments

avon March 7, 2024 - 2:19 pm

Thank you for the really useful advice. Of all the advice, I am going to rescue the one I like the most, which is patience and a sense of humor.

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Solar April 21, 2024 - 3:45 am

Very important information for me. Thank you.

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